The Corndog Experience

The amount of excitement that surrounded this corndog day was crazy! It’s all I could think of for days. I finally get to make my own corndogs and it doesn’t involve deep frying! Deep frying frightens me. I know, I know, I’ve deep fried food before but there’s a stick involved and stuff. *eye roll* Excuses.

On a windy Saturday, H1 had a few folks over to gather for her cousin’s arrival from out of town for the weekend. As always, she had a great spread set up, including shooters. Seriously, I don’t know a human being on the planet that loves shooters as much as H1. Jello shooters to start, and once those were done, Malibu with a blueberry in it. No wonder the end of the night was a blur. Thankfully, I made my corndogs prior to partaking in shots.

Corndog Batter

1 c yellow cornmeal

½ c whole wheat flour

½ c all purpose flour

2 tsp kosher salt

1 tsp baking powder

¼ tsp baking soda

½ tsp cayenne pepper

1 jalapeno, finely minced and seeded

1 c buttermilk

2 eggs, beaten

8 dogs

In a medium sized mixing bowl, combine the cornmeal, flour, salt, baking powder, baking soda and cayenne pepper. In a separate bowl, combine the eggs, jalapeno and buttermilk.

Add the wet ingredients to the dry ingredients all at once, stir only enough times to bring batter together. Set aside and let rest for at least 10 minutes. Mine was made in the afternoon and then sat for about 6 hours in the fridge. Brought up to room temperature prior to cooking.

My batter wasn’t your classic carnie-style corndog batter. It was more like my cornbread dough/mixture. I basically took the base of my cornbread recipe and added elements of a classic corndog runny batter. I think it needs to be re-worked though. The outside was a little to bready and I really need to work on the batter to dog ratio. It still worked and was really tasty though.

Not only did we make meat corndogs and veggie corndogs, I had the most brilliant idea ever to batter pickles. Pickledog? I drained the pickles and patted them down the night before to ensure the result wasn’t too wet and soggy. That was sheer brilliance on my part, not going to lie.

Here’s how it went down…spray the cooking surface with cooking spray or brush with oil. Fill cooking compartment (?) with batter to about ¾ fullness.

Insert dog or pickle or intended stuff to be coated. Top with more batter.

Close top and cook for 10 minutes. Ta-dah!

All in all, the “Carnival Corn Dog’r Maker” was a success. I look forward to fucking around with batter mixture to not make it so bready and more coaty. Also really looking forward to finding new things to batter. Suggestions? Ideas? Submissions being accepted.

One idea that I’m really excited about trying is a chicken strip, a drizzle of maple syrup and then waffle batter. You know, to mimic the fried chicken and waffle idea? Oh my gawd, I sometimes wonder how I’m not 300 lbs.

Today’s Lunch, 2012.02.23

The plan was for H1 and I to go somewhere new and find a food truck we haven’t visited yet. Then we realised how cold it was outside and decided to go for Mom’s Grilled Cheese truck nearby. Yeeeeeeah, that’s a great excuse to go back to Mom’s.

Not new to us, in fact, H1 orders the Jackson Three every time we go. This time I ordered that meatloaf sandwich that I’ve been coveting for ages but was too scared to order thinking that it would be way too much food for me.

I don’t have to eat all of it, right? *eye roll* The sandwich is on grilled white bread (which I’m not normally a fan of but I listened to Mom, who recommended it), meatloaf topped with marinara sauce and then surrounded by mozzarella and parmesan cheeses. I place my order and the gal at the window asks if I want to add any additional toppings. Sliced red onion? Bacon? Hmmm…I don’t know. Wait, did you say bacon? YES! Bring the bacon! I added bacon and a pickle.

H1 finishes her sandwich before we even get back to the office (we work 3 blocks away) but I’ve managed to wait for mine. I think I would have had to considering how messy it was going to be. I tie back my hair, take off my suit jacket and tuck a napkin into my dress’s neckline as a bib. I meant business.

So did my sandwich. Meatloaf grilled cheese with bacon: 1, Moonbeam Bouvier: 0. I barely made it half way through but like a good trooper I marched on through the second half. I was in pain. Major full belly pain. Why do I always do this to myself?

My boss always laughs at H1 and I when we moan about how bad our guts hurt after we go to the grilled cheese truck. “Um, ladies, what did you think your stomachs were going to do when you assault them with pounds of cheese in a short amount of time?” Yeah, yeah, yeah. Half an hour later my meatloaf sandwich baby is doing flip-flops in my belly but it was so worth it. Maybe it just wasn’t used to have food in it at lunchtime. I’ve been so busy at work the last couple of days that the earliest I’ve been able to eat is 6. Yes, 6pm. 18:00. I’m so ready for this fucking shit ass week to be done.

In exciting news, my corndog factory arrived yesterday! I can’t wait to experiment at H1’s this weekend. Yay for corndogs! We’ll have to make veggie ones for c.lo but H1 says that she has amazing dogs that she’s been wanting to try so I think we’re in for an amazing corndog experience.

Because Nigella Told Me To

A loooooooong, looooooong time ago I spotted a macaroon recipe by Nigella and had immediately put it on my “to-make” list. It took a while to get around to finally making the recipe and now kick myself for waiting so long. I love coconut but I’m normally not a huge macaroon fan because they can sometimes turn out to be hard little coconut nubs. This recipe promised huge fluffy macaroons so I thought I’d give them a whirl. If Nigella says make macaroons, who am I to argue?

Coconut Macaroons

2 large egg whites

¼ tsp cream of tartar

100g sugar

30g ground almonds

pinch of salt

1 tsp vanilla extract

250g shredded coconut

Preheat the over to 350ºF.

Beat the egg whites until frothy and add cream of tartar. Continue beating eggs until soft peaks are formed. Add sugar one teaspoon at a time and whisk until the peaks can hold their shape and are shiny. Fold in the almonds, salt, vanilla and coconut. The mixture will be sticky but should hold its shape when clumped together.

Form into clementine-sized domes, but not too flat. Cook for 20 minutes on parchment paper lined cookie sheet.

The result? Outside they are giant, fluffy and perfectly crisped mounds. Inside they are soft mouthfuls of vacation. I made them with love, that’s why. Rather than using an electric beater, I went old school and whipped the egg whites using a whisk and elbow grease. 45 minutes of giving egg whites old fashioneds may have been what really helped fluff up the macaroons.

In case you don’t know what an old fashioned is, please watch below.

Macaroons remind me of housewives and pink cashmere sweaters and pearls (and now of giving old fashioneds). I’m not sure why. They kind of seem like a particularly dated baked delight. So to fuck with my vision of housewife happiness, decided to make mine wearing my usual uniform of all black and listened to the below while baking "metal macaroons". P.S. Only 38 more sleeps until my beloved Devildriver show! (Or some shit like that. I couldn't be fucked to do countdown math right now.)

Travel Planning, aka A Really Good Reason To Have People Over

Exactly what the title says. I invited H1, Nat and Batfoot over yesterday so that we could get together and try to hammer down some dates, places to stay, what we’re going to do, etc. regarding our Amsterdam and Paris trip in September. Unfortunately, Batfoot fell ill but the rest of us got together, we now have firm dates and know that Nat is going to drink champagne every day that we are in Paris. “I’m going to brush my teeth with that shit.” ~ Nat

While watching food porn a while ago, The Best Thing I Ever Ate mentioned a crêpe cake and I was very intrigued. What a fucking amazing idea! A crêpe, a layer of pastry cream, repeat. I also decided that I wanted to pour sugar over the top of it and brulée the top for a nice crispy texture. Here’s what I came up with…

Pastry Cream Crepe Cake

Crepes:

6 tbsp butter

3 c milk

6 eggs

1½ c all-purpose flour

7 tbsp sugar

pinch salt

Pastry Cream:

1 egg

1 tbsp all-purpose flour

2 tbsp sugar

1 tbsp cornstarch

1 c milk

1 tsp vanilla

1 tsp hot water

2 tbsp heavy cream, whipped

To Assemble:

sugar

kitchen torch

Prepare crêpe batter by melting butter In a small pan, until lightly browned. Remove from heat and set aside.

In a separate small pan, warm the milk until steaming, remove from heat and set aside to allow to cool slightly.

In a large bowl using an electric mixer at low speed, mix together eggs, flour, sugar and salt. Slowly add the warm milk and browned butter. Pour batter into a tightly sealed container to refrigerate for several hours or overnight.

Then prepare the pastry cream. In a small bowl add egg, flour, sugar and cornstarch. Beat until smooth.

In a saucepan over low heat, bring milk to a simmer. Remove immediately from heat and slowly whisk the milk into the egg mixture. Return all ingredients to the saucepan. While stirring constantly, about 5 minutes, until thickened and comes to a boil. Remove from heat. Add vanilla and hot water, stir until they dissolve into the mixture. Set aside to cool until firm.

When the pastry cream has cooled, fold in the whipped cream. Refrigerate until thick (best overnight).

Not going to lie, this process was an exercise of patience and timing. I was trying to text while making the crêpes and it was near disasterous. I know the directions say to stack the crêpes, but I would just let one cool while one cooked and assembled as I went. I basically made crêpes until I ran out of batter. In the end, it was twenty. Below was what my assembly station looked like.

To make crêpes, remove the batter from refrigerator and bring to room temperature. Line baking sheets with parchment paper. Using nonstick or lightly oiled crepe pan over medium-low heat, evenly distribute approximately 1/4 cup crêpe batter, swirl to cover the surface of the pan. Cook approximately 2 minutes or until bottom becomes lightly browned.

Using a spatula with a light hand, gently and carefully turn the crêpe over and continue cooking for a few minutes longer. Remove the cooked crêpe onto the prepared baking sheet with layers of parchment in between (not stacking them on top of each other). Repeat this process until you have approximately 20 crêpes.

To finish the pastry cream, remove the pastry cream mixture from the refrigerator. In a separate bowl, whip 2 cups of heavy cream with 1 tbsp sugar. Gently fold the whipped cream into the pastry cream.

To assemble, place one crêpe on a cake plate. With a small offset spatula, completely cover the crêpe with a thin layer of pastry cream. Cover with another crêpe and repeat covering with pastry cream until finished layering all approximately 20 crêpes.

Refrigerate for at least 2 hours prior to serving. Once ready to serve, minus half an hour, remove cake from fridge and allow to sit at room temperature. Sprinkle top of cake with sugar. Get a fucking flame thrower because we’re going to have fun now. Or just get that mini blow torch that you use for making crème brulée and torch the top of the cake to make a nice caramel finish.

Here’s what you don’t do: try to refill the butane when not necessary so that it leaks out of the torch and now you’re scared shitless to have to light the sonofabitch. Though it seems a bit much, the caramelized finish really helped out the texture of the “cake”. A photo from Nat below, steady hand and concentration was required.

Besides the “cake”, I also put together a famous Moonbeam Bouvier charcuterie spread. Genoa salami, chèvre cheese, capicola, grapes, brie, spicy soppressata, Roquefort, butter (to go with Roquefort), 4 kinds of crackers, a baguette, spicy fig spread, spicy pear spread, hazelnuts, almonds, dried cherries, pickles, roasted red pepper spread.

Without a shadow of a doubt, this is my absolute favourite way to eat. I love the adventuring and figuring out which flavours go with which. My favourite combos of the evening were 1) baguette, butter, Roquefort, spicy pear spread, and 2) baguette, brie and spicy fig spread. All of this with lovely, lovely wines = Moonie’s heavenly place.

It was also decided that we would all have to lose about 50 pounds before this holiday because that’s approximately the amount that we’ll gain on our eating adventures. I can’t freaking wait!